Expectations
Young Esther Mortina looks round the bathroom, the room still smelling of the special glue used on the tiles. She is pleased, a smug smile lighting up her face. When she hears the door open behind her she turns round, and her smiles grows even bigger. “Hi Mum,” she says, voice vibrating with excitement, “do you like it? I just love the softer colour in this bathroom. It makes it look more…I don’t know, more Scandinavian.” Her mother laughs, shakes her head, and gives the excited Esther a hug. “I just wanted he house to feel more ‘me’ and I thought, if I do this room, then somehow it will feel more real, you know?” she says to her mum, looking a little worried now, wondering if her mum will be upset.
Tabitha smiles, shakes her head again, and comments, “Don’t you worry girl, I think it does look lovely. Not sure about it looking Scandinavian, but of course, if you feel it does, well, that’s all that matters!”
Esther looks shocked at that, and reacts with a “No, it’s not for me, Mum! I want Magnus to feel at home once we are married and he comes to live here!” She looks round her again, her frown growing steadily now. “Do you think he’ll like it? Of course, their house is lovely, and he’ll probably take ages to settle, don’t you think? I mean, he loves his family, and they all have Norse names, so I just wanted to have at least one room that felt a bit more homelike…” Yes, the frown is now fully grown, and firmly in place. Tabitha sighs, Esther is as changeable as the weather. English weather that is; English weather in…in Autumn, or early Spring!
“Sweetheart, I’m sure the young man will be fine, and I’m sure he’ll only have eyes for you. Unless he is really into design, or a professional decorator or whatnot, he’s probably not even going to notice the colour of the tiles. Don’t worry about it, I’m sure it will all work out!” She hugs Esther a bit tighter, a little sad to see the worry lines still in place, eyes wandering round the bathroom, inspecting it, imagining her Viking in it… Will it be good enough?
The worry lines disappear soon enough though, for Esther checks her emails on the computer and sees the party invite! There it is, the party of all parties, as far as Esther is concerned! The party of her life, as it will be the very moment she will meet Magnus. Magnus her Viking, promised to her in marriage, and this party will be the start of their future together. She will get to meet him, in person, at his home… His cousin is throwing the party, and she is a little in awe of Bjorn. He seems so grown up and mature from what she has heard, and to actually meet him at this special party…it all seems a bit daunting! Somehow, meeting Kiera, Magnus’ mum seems less frightening than his older cousin. She has seen Kiera round the house before, talking to her parents, arranging matters no doubt. Her hair is a beautiful shade of blue, and although Esther would never dye her hair, she secretly thinks it suits Kiera.
The countdown to the party starts, and Esther’s heartrate goes up in sync with the hours. She keeps looking through the home catalogues, wondering if she’ll be able to persuade her slightly boisterous nephew and morose sister to part with some of the Mortina money…just to buy some Norse looking furniture. It would be a nice touch, she thinks. She looks across the room at Eva, who is actually looking quite pleased with life for a change. Probably because of her own party invite, where she’ll finally get to meet up with Paul. Esther starts to take a breath to make the suggestion, then quietly breathes out again. She has just remembered the awful time she’s had with Eva not that long ago. Eva had been terrible, accusing Esther of all sorts of things, complaining and attacking her. They made up, of course they did, they were sisters after all. Cousin Samuel had helped a bit with his comments, but Esther was quite sure that Eva would have come round of her own accord as well. To ask for money at this point might be asking for more trouble though.
Esther sighs, there isn’t that much Norse looking stuff in the catalogue anyway, so it might not be worth digging up the hatchet for that. Now dresses, well, that is a different matter all together! She will need a dress, something pretty, something that makes her stand out. Probably something colourful; judging by his mum’s hair, he might like strong colours. She fleeting wonders about genetics and hair colours, but dismisses it from her mind, as she knows exactly what a Viking, Her Viking, looks like. Her looks are what matters at this moment, as she wants to catch his eye, wants to make the right impression on Magnus. She knows the marriage is all arranged, promises made as much as possible, but nothing is set in stone. The SiMobile Government can easily overthrow things like parties, or refuse to give out a Moving Permit, or… Esther shudders, the Government is very powerful, who knows what could go wrong!
The last thing she wants is for Magnus to regret the whole thing. It would be awful if he will just agree to the date at the café, out of a sense of duty, but nothing more. What if there is absolutely no spark between them? What if he looks down on her, thinks she is dowdy and plain, boring and not worth his time? He could pull out of the arrangement easily enough! Esther can feel her hands starting to get clammy, little dewdrops start to appear on her nose and forehead, making her auburn hair look darker. She takes a deep breath, and when that doesn’t help, decides to do what she does best: check the web! He dashes over to her computer, legacy of her Dad and uncle, and types in what she fears the most: ‘Pulling out from Arranged Marriage’.
Her heart beats a wild, skipping dance when she sees the amount of pages coming up. “Oh no,” she whispers, her hands shaking so much that she can’t type in any more. “Oh no, it’s so common! Look, party cancelled last minute, unable to meet. Party full, unable to attend meeting up party. Sibling refused Permit, so unable to move in my newly wedded husband.. Oh no, Ohhh, what am I going to do? If it falls through…I can’t cope, I will never be able to bear it, I…I won’t be able to carry on with my life as if nothing happened! I want to retire straight away, I want to…to just disappear! I know something will go wrong, look at the statistics, it’s bound to go wrong… Lord, what am I going to do? I couldn’t bear it, I just couldn’t bear it…” She drops her head on her arms next to the keyboard, and sobs, and sobs…as if the disaster has already arrived!
That is how her aunt finds her. She only came to dust the grand piano, as the dark red wood shows up the dust so badly, when she finds her niece sobbing as if something dreadful has happened. “Esther dear, what has happened? Come on, dear child, come on, calm down a bit and tell me! I’m sure we can assist you somehow; come on now, it used to be my job to counsel courteously, so let me try and help you!” Victoria K. Mortina also used to assist as a superhero in her younger days, but she doesn’t normally mention that, and she is sure that her niece doesn’t want to hear that at this time.
Esther sits up, and dries her face, calming herself down a little with great effort, and looks at her aunt, despair in her eyes, “Oh Auntie Victoria,” she begins, sobs still stretching some of the syllables in awkward places, “I just looked up about arranged marriages not working out…so many pages came up, there is just so much that can go wrong! I just feel all may be lost, and if I don’t get to meet Magnus, or if he changes his mind, or…or if SiMobile Government refuses to give out the permit, then…Oh auntie,” and new grief overcomes poor Esther, and she breaks down in wails again, “I couldn’t bear it,” she wails, “I just couldn’t bear it, and I wouldn’t know what to do!”
Her aunt is so astonished that she doesn’t say anything; she just stares at Esther with her mouth open. Gracious, this entire emotional outburst is all for the ‘worst case scenarios’ of SiMobile life? Seriously? Victoria takes a deep breath and using her well polished court room voice says, quite sternly, but kindly, “Esther, calm down at once. This won’t do, you can’t go and meet Magnus with red eyes and a drippy nose. The poor lad won’t know what hit him! Listen child, you are wasting energy on ‘what ifs’. That’s a foolish road to travel, as it leads you nowhere. Yes, it’s possible that calamity is waiting for you down the road, and you’ll have to deal with it as best you can. There is nothing certain in SiMobile, nothing. Not even retirement, as the Llama Flu can prevent people from retiring. You have to do the best you can though, and trust in God for the rest. As a famous general once said, ‘Trust in God and keep your powder dry’. Do what you can, and leave the rest to Him.
Esther is starting to feel a little embarrassed over her outburst; well, more than embarrassed really, it all of a sudden looks so silly! What has gotten into her! Going off on one like that? Her aunt smiles at her, and gives her a careful hug, trying to keep her purple dress meticulously neat. “Don’t worry, sweetie, we all get jittery about something or other! It’s just the nerves, we totally understand that. It’s such a big occasion, that very first party! I still remember mine..” her eyes glaze over, and a very dreamy smile grows and grows. “There was your uncle, standing in room, by himself, and I recognised him straight away, went up to him, we got chatting, and well, here we are! Married for many years now, retired, enjoying our twilight years still together.” Esther didn’t think the dreamy smile could grow anymore, but she was wrong: it could and did!
After washing her face, and shaking her head at herself in the mirror over the sink, she walks over to the wardrobe. The big decision: what to wear! She grins then, remembering her Dad quoting, ‘A woman has two problems: nothing to wear, and not enough space in her wardrobe’. How true, she grins, how very true, Dad. Mmmmm, that red dress..? Nope, not with my hair colour. Pink? No, too sweet. Ah, this is the one, I just know it! Blue and green, and bold and beautifully cut, that is it!”
Esther twirls around in her dress. It really is a lovely dress, if not a little short… She plucks at it a little; she doesn’t want Magnus to think she’s giving out the wrong message! It does show off her shape in a lovely way though, making her feel special, beautiful, attractive. If only Magnus thinks the same, she sighs, feeling a funny flutter in her stomach, travelling up into her throat. She is nervous, very nervous, but it’s a happy nervousness, her eyes sparkling, her auburn hair soft and a little wavy.
The first person she meets at the party is Bjorn. Yes, his is everything she imagined him to be, the strong older cousin, gauging her, assessing her, not in an unkind manner, but definitely feeling protective when it comes to his younger cousin. Esther tries to look as graceful and assured as she can under Bjorn’s scrutiny, actually appreciating his care for his younger relatives. She walks up to Bjorn, feeling shy, and struggling to breath. She would love to look around her, glancing at the other people attending the party, convinced she can spot a Viking a mile off. Spot her Viking better than anyone keeping watch along the coast was able to spot the ‘dragon-ships’! Esther forces herself to look ahead at the man in front of her, and keeps her smile in place, somehow. She can tell the regard Bjorn has for Magnus, and she is suddenly glad. “So, Esther? Have you met my little cousin yet?” Bjorn asks her, a small smile making him look a little less threatening. She tries to laugh lightly, but can hear herself give off an odd giggle, “No, not yet, I just arrived, and wanted to come and thank you for the party first,” she says, feeling her cheeks starting to warm up.
Bjorn smiles, and waves his hand round, encompassing the house. “Well, he’s here somewhere, just follow the sound of laughing, that’s probably him! I like your dress, by the way, very good choice, if I may say so…” Yes, time to go off into another room, her cheeks now feel like they are on fire! She hastily mumbles something polite, and walks off as fast as she can without looking as if she is making a dash for it. She comes into another tastefully decorated room…and another…and just as she is about to open another door, she can hear a laugh. A deep, manly laugh, full of vitality; full of life and kindness; the sort of laugh that warms your heart, as it does now, she thinks. She just instinctively knows it’s him: Her Viking!
Their eyes meet, his laugh dies away, but his eyes light up even more, and his smile is the best she has ever seen… she walks over to him on shaking legs, regretting the short dress for a short moment. She drinks in his handsome, kind face, gasps a little at his hair, blue as the ocean after a storm. Yes, he’s her Viking, her Magnus, and the colour suits her mood after the emotional storm she has just been through! It also matches her dress, something that they laugh about on many happy occasions. “He’s a dream come through,” Esther sings in her heart, “Thank you Lord, he’s my dream man, he’s my man! At least, he will be shortly, very shortly if it’s anything to do with me!” Feeling his strong arms, feeling his warmth, his manly scent…Esther fleetingly observes that it’s a good thing he’s so good at hugging her, for otherwise she would probably float away, far off into SiMobile’s blue skies…her heart lighter than anything imaginable, her head filed with giddiness, legs only vertical because of Magnus’ embrace. It is his gentleness and kindness that pleases her the most. He makes her feel special, the way he listens to her nervous chatter, the way he smiles at her jokes, and the way he looks after her at the party. She desperately wants to look at her phone, to check the time, to see if it is possible to slip away from the party without appearing rude, just to start their courtship, to meet up at the little café, to begin this amazing new chapter in her life, the one she has been desperate to read, if only it had been there…