Growing closer

Growing closer

Even good parties have to end, some sooner than others. Esther is just so relieved that she managed to meet Magnus at his own home, however daunting it was! It is nice to meet at parties, she thinks, meeting somebody amongst friends and family, although I wished it had been somewhere private really. Esther is sitting in the lounge, photobook on the brand new coffee table made of beautiful light coloured wood, matching the wooden floor. She sits there, looking at recent pictures. She strokes the pictures of her and Magnus, grinning, remembering her nervousness, and Magnus’ kindness. It seems so long ago, for so many things have happened. She chuckles when she remembers the first date at the café.

“I thought we would never get away,” she whispers, smiling broadly, when she sees the next picture, “the party went on for ages, and I was so nervous! Björn was there, watching, and lots of other friends and relatives… we managed to leave together though, and how wonderful the date was!” The café had not been too busy, so they actually got a table, rather than just sing, talk to he plant and check mugs. Her smile fades a tiny bit, for it was in the cafe’s bright light, sitting opposite Magnus at a tiny table that she managed to get a good look. She loved his smiling face, his kind eyes, and his broad shoulders. It was his hair…she hadn’t quite realised how blue his hair was… he had even dyed his eyebrows and stubble!

Esther hadn’t said anything, of course not, but a tiny shiver had rocked her heart. She looks at the pictures in front of her; Magnus in his bright red jacket, and blue beard and eyebrows. She sighs a little, as it feels so petty! He is such a wonderful young man, so helpful and kind, and here she is, moaning about his hair colour. It is just that I imagined him as a Viking, she thinks, smiling a sad smile now. I have let my imagination run away with me again!

She turns the pages of the album, the pages of her heart as well, for she has to move on from these feelings, somehow! She looks at her phone, looks at the door. Magnus will be here any minute now. She feels her heart skipping a bit faster, her breath speeding up just by thinking about him. He really is a great guy, she thinks, her smile growing with anticipation. Miriam has already arrived, to spend time with cousin Samuel. She can hear them in the kitchen, stirring something to eat no doubt, as well as stirring up trouble… Miriam’s raucous laughter can be heard all through the house. Esther looks at the album, biting her lip. Is Miriam really the right person for Samuel Vince? Samuel likes a joke, he is quite noisy himself, laughs a lot, but Miriam takes it to a completely new level!

“I’m glad my Viking is a lot more refined,” she thinks smugly, “he just knows how to behave towards a girl!” Then she remembers her first meeting, and how she had heard him laugh from the next room. Esther giggles to herself, “Oops I think I’m biased! His laugh is not coarse though, it’s a good manly laugh!” She can hear the door being opened, and quickly puts the album away and gets up to smooth her clothes before briskly walking up to the main doors. Magnus’ smile grows very bright indeed when he sees his girl, his Esther. He hugs her, almost lifting her off the ground! He goes to say hello to Samuel Vince and Miriam, before having some tea with Esther.

She watches him, and notices how well he gets on with Samuel. They both laugh, and chat, standing straight, making themselves bigger and taking a wide stance, like sailors on a moving ship. She can’t hide the grin, until she sees Miriam watching the men as well. Miriam is laughing her wild laugh, and sidles up to Samuel Vince, tugging his arm to get him closer. She doesn’t take her eyes off Magnus though, and Esther all of a sudden feels something like panic starting up in her chest. “Hands off,” she whispers to herself, glaring at Miriam, who looks back with her bright blue eyes, laughs loudly, tosses her black hair over her shoulder, and drags Samuel out of the kitchen. “Come on, Samuel, let’s go. Where were we? Was the proposal next, or were we still on the last short event?”

Magnus sees Esther’s upset face, and laughs, taking her in her arms. “Ignore them,” his voice rumbles in her ear, “she’s just winding you up! Samuel will have to watch her, she’ll run rings round him! It’s much more important that we remember where we got to last time, don’t you think?” He turns her round, so she is facing the kitchen counter, and whispers’ “You promised me your favourite pudding. Don’t you realise that a man’s love goes via his stomach?”

Esther feels her heart becoming closer to Magnus every day. He is great to be with, listens well to her chatter, and is so patient! Samuel likes him as well, although when he tells Esther what he and the lads get up to, she wonders if they are really talking about the same Magnus… Esther loves how Magnus takes charge, making her feel cherished and cared for. He opens the door for her, guiding her through it with a strong but gentle hand. She smiles to herself, yes, she has fallen for him alright! “You are everything I need in another person,” she confides in him that afternoon, when she is trying to hide her clammy hands on the sofa. She really wants to explain to him how she feels for him, but doesn’t want to go all weepy on him! “You see, I get so worried about things; what people think of me, and if I have upset somebody, or if my work is good enough… I know it’s silly and I know that in Jesus I’m perfect, and the only thing that really matters is how God sees me. I forget, though, and I start worrying about little things, never feeling good enough…” she stops, as she knows that if she carries on, her tears would come.

Magnus smiles his extra kind smile, and gives her a squeeze. “Don’t worry so much; you are a wonderful person, and you have so much strength and courage, nobody will be able to get you down!” Esther looks at his strong face, and smiles back; she has too! Something inside her wobbles though, for she knows that nobody is perfect of themselves; there is nobody in the world that you can trust all the time for all things. Every person is fallible, had faults, issues, failures… She looks at her strong, brave Viking, and feels a little sadness spring up, like a tiny warning sign, reminding her that even her handsome Viking will not do for everything. “God, you’re my all, my everything, my Peace, my ultimate Protector, and I am grateful for this wonderful man, who is such a special gift!”

Magnus seems to have forgotten the incident with Miriam within minutes of them leaving the kitchen, helped by Esther’s pudding no doubt, but Esther is worried. That Miriam, honestly, you never now what the girl will do next. She isn’t one for hanging around either, and before Esther and Magnus have finished all the events necessary, Miriam and Samuel Vince Mortina are officially engaged! Esther is very upset; she manages to hide this from Samuel who comes to tell her the exciting news, his smile almost as wide as Miriam’s. At least he is kind about it, and says, much quieter, “You and Magnus will get there soon as well. Also, you know that Magnus’ Moving Permit will have top priority, because of his family? Miriam’s parents are new in town, and they’re not even married, they didn’t have the money. Eva has just received her Moving Permit, as she got engaged to Paul recently, so that will speed things up. We will have to wait for her to actually move out though. She and Paul are getting married, but as they are the first couple in the family to do so, it will be a long and very expensive process. Eva insisted on it though, said she wanted to be made an honest woman.” Samuel had suddenly laughed, one of his mischievous laughs, and adds, “I wonder if she really does, or whether she just wants to annoy people; make people wait, string Paul along to all sorts of endless appointments, you know, shopping for clothes, checking the menu, that sort of thing. I wouldn’t put it past your sister…!”

Neither would Esther, but all she can think of is her own marriage, and the wait for her and Magnus if Miriam gets her papers first. Especially as they’re engaged, they now will be able to get married, and she is quite sure that Miriam really doesn’t mind waiting for her permit, even if she has been married for a while already. Esther and Magnus agreed to marry at the very time that his papers will be in the post. That way they will be able to have their wedding night in the Mortina House. Esther looks round her room, and all of a sudden she feels the tears dripping on her hands! She just cracks after all the stress and worry, the excitement and anticipation. It just is too much all of a sudden. She lies down on her bed, and sobs and sobs. Half her tears are happy tears, the other half are sad, worried, scared and disappointed tears.

After a while she calms down, and she sits up, looking round the room. She wonders who will have the big room, the blue room with the bassinet. If Magnus gets his Permit first, and…and they fill the bassinet first…she puts her hands on her belly, trying to imagine the baby growing, with typical SiMobile speed, lying in the little family bassinet. She looks at the bassinet, a sweet, warm smile softens her face, making her look like a beautiful young woman, a woman loving, living. Then, her smile disappears just as suddenly, and she gives a little gasp. “Oh! Oh, I had forgotten…I wonder…No, he said, didn’t he? It…it just felt so wrong… Lord, I don’t know what to do, or say, or even think,” she breathes, “it was such a strange incident, and well, I love Magnus, he is such a good and kind man, so I’m sure what he did was alright? I just feel worried about it, and…and I have to admit Lord, that it just doesn’t seem to line up. With the verse about being unequally yoked, about light and darkness not having fellowship together…But then, this is Magnus, and he seems so full of light and life…I can’t see…Oh God, I just don’t know, but it feels wrong.”

She lies back on the bed, arms behind her head, thinking, staring at the ceiling. It had happened the other day, soon after the Proposal event. She had come into this room to get a special dress for a party they both wanted to go to. She had found Magnus, standing by the bassinet, holding something in his hand, whispering, mumbling something, and then he put the item, which looked like a little silver cross on a leather string in the bassinet. When he spotted Esther, his face had become one big smile, like it always did on seeing her. She had asked him what he had done, curious, as the little item seemed like a cross. He had laughed his loud, warm, rumbling laugh, and explained, “No my love, it’s a very old Viking thing that we do in our family. We have done so for endless generations, as long as I know. It’s a little Viking symbol, and you put it in the bassinet, you know, as a token for the little one; to show that he belongs, you see.” From this, she had guessed that it wasn’t a little silver cross then…she had wondered what it was, but didn’t want to ask; didn’t want to hurt his feelings, although he never seemed to think in those terms.

Esther sits up, suddenly overcome with nosiness, unable to constrain herself any longer, and after a very quick peek outside the door, to listen to where everyone was in the rambling Mortina home, she quickly goes up to the little bassinet, and her fingers curl round the little cool object on the leather strap. She brings it out, and stares in horror. No, it’s definitely not a cross. It’s a little hammer, a Mjolnir, Thor’s Hammer. A Viking symbol. A Norse symbol, here, in her home, put there by her fiancé, and even knowing what it is, she still is unsure what to do, if she should do something that is…Well, apart from slipping it back into its place, her mind whirling, hands clammy, her mouth dry. She turns away from the bassinet, and all she can think is, “I need to think. I’m sure it’s alright, but I need to think…”